Emo Spidey is a Dick

Spiderman 3
Directed by Who Cares

Well Spidey had a record setting opening weekend so when Becky and Zach wanted to go, I caved in and shelled out the bucks for Spiderman 3 last weekend. I should have just given the money to a homeless person and then slammed my head in a door for 2 hours because that would have been more worthwhile. So if any of you haven't seen it yet, don't.

Well, I've already given my review but for those of you who want to know why it was so sucktacular, I'll outline the worst of it.
1. The dialog sucks, as expected, but was actually so artificial and stupid that it caused unintentional laughs at several points. Although mentioning Hamiltonians earns the writers ten bonus points.
2. The villains aren't scary, or really all that villainy. Thomas Hayden Church (Wings, Sideways) is the sandman (what??) whose molecules are replaced by sand when he falls into an open-air particle physics experiment?? This insults me as a physics major on so many levels. Then spidey's buddy Harry goes all Goblin Jr. and attacks Parker, gets knocked out and ends up with amnesia (temporary I assure you) . Then spidey gets some space goop on him and gets all emo/wierd dancing fetishy. Well this causes him to be a dick to Topher Grace, whose character name escapes me so I'll just call him Foreman, who asks God to kill spidey, conveniently enough in the same church where Spidey is trying to shed the space goop. Long story short, space goop lands on Foreman and gives him sharp yellow teeth.
If that all is stupid/confusing to you, the movie doesn't make any more sense of it either.
3. As bad as the dialog was, the acting was worse. The actors had no chemistry together so that you never get to care about them or their obnoxious fucking relationships. And the scenes that are supposed to be the most emotionally heavy are delivered either so woodenly or so melodramatically (with nothing in between) that they just end up laughable.

Please don't see this fucking movie.